Wednesday, October 1, 2008
I Know What Men Like (Garter Belts and Bright Red Lipstick ? Nope. Sweatpants? Absolutely!) - Part 1 of 2
I hoped that title would get your attention. Truth is, I interviewed one man, Anslem (at length) to get his opinion on what women wear - from our hair to our shoes. I got this post idea while having dinner with Mr. TK one night and him calling me out (he’s good for that) about looking another woman up and down. I know, I know: shame on me. But, it got me to thinking that women often check out what other women are wearing much more than men notice what we’re wearing. And just in case you still think that your crush will notice your Nine West pumps are actually Christian Louboutin knock-offs, I interviewed my friend Anslem to prove you wrong. (Oh and if your crush does notice the difference well, you might need to re-evaluate some things…)
I interviewed Anslem because I think he’s honest, has his ish together and is representative of many guys I (and you) know. But again, he’s one man. I cannot confirm that his opinions reflect those of your man or even the man you want to be your man. But, if you continue reading ladies (and gents since I do have some male readers - what up Barney!), I guarantee you’ll learn a few things. I surely did. And by the way, Anslem holds down a blog himself called Naked With Socks On where he skillfully writes about everything from politics to relationships. Good stuff.
So, I started the interview off by asking Anslem what female celebs always make him do a double-take in the style department. Here’s what he said:
Kerry Washington: She glows. And she has a very warm smile and a cute overbite but it works for her. Her teeth are sparkling white.
Jill Scott: She seems real through her voice and her words. She carries herself very well for a full-figured woman.
Jada Pinkett Smith: She’s getting older but she is even more attractive. When I think of her, I think of strength and confidence.
Ciara: Surprised? Me too. Seems Anslem is mucho impressed by Ciara’s maturity and grace. He claims that she is very level-headed for her age. He also said he likes the way her style has evolved from tomboyish teenager to classy young woman.
And although he didn’t mention her during our interview, apparently Res makes him do a triple-take…
Next, I had him tell me his preferences on a few things that almost always seem to come up in grown folks convos…
natural hair vs. relaxed hair - Natural hair is his weakness -- locks, twists, afros, he loves them all. He also appreciates a woman with a short cut. There is a certain confidence that she evokes he says.
lingerie vs. a wife beater and boy shorts - Both have pluses according to Anslem but those over-the-top va, va voom corset, garter belt situations make him think of hookers. Which he goes on to admit might not be a bad thing depending on his mood, but generally isn't his preference.
heels vs. flats - He's not opposed to flats but thinks woman strut differently when they're wearing heels. There is even something sexy about the 'clicking' noise they make.
make-up vs. well, no make-up - I wanna know what you look like says Ans. He no likey the foundation and powder plus he thinks it makes a woman seem like she's trying to cover up something.
I also found out his biggest turn-ons and turn-offs:
turn-offs- [tight jeans/pants that create] muffin-tops
- panty waste (You gotta read his hilarious post about this.)
- ashy feet/heels in sandals
turn-ons- sweatpants (without words or logos on the butt area) - Anslem says, "If you can attract me when you’re wearing sweats, then when you’re really dressed…"
- high heels - They add to her walk, they raise her bottom, draw attention to her calves. Who knew that heels alter the way our butts look????
- long, flowy skirts (The way it moves around the body is what gets him.)
So it looks like men (or at least men who think like Anslem) certainly do notice what we wear and how we wear it but couldn’t care any less about labels or even trends. The fact that you managed to score the same clutch that Rihanna carried during Milan’s Fashion Week certainly might impress your girls. But that cutie pie you’ve been eyeing in the gym? Not so much. And please know that I’m in NO WAY encouraging anyone to dress (solely) for a man’s attention. How lame would that be? Mr. TK loathes my animal print rain boots but that surely hasn’t stopped me from wearing them. But, I do hope that everyone keeps this post in mind when agonizing over what to wear on that date with the cutie pie from the gym. I’m not suggesting you wear sweats (although that just might be what got you the date), but don’t fret because you don’t have a new DVF wrap dress to rock either.
Ladies (and gents), what do you think? Did you learn anything? Are Anslem’s views similar to yours or those of your significant other? Discuss, please. And Anslem, muchas gracias for your patience and letting me pick your brain!
Don't forget to come back tomorrow for part 2!